To the heartbroken on Mother’s Day
I have three little boys. Like many of you, I spent Mother’s Day opening handmade cards, unwrapping decorated flower pots, and reading through “All About My Mom” books made at school, in which I learned that my favorite thing to do is cook corn, my favorite thing to eat is corn, and when I’m not…
Raising Boys…While We Have Them.
After six years into this mother of boys gig, I’ve come to know a thing or two. The biggest of which, is that I actually know nothing. But despite my utter cluelessness, I do have a few tips for my fellow halfway-to-crazy parents raising these tiny tornadoes called boys.
If Adults Could Tantrum Like Kids
It’s been one of those days. Nothing went your way. Missed a deadline at work. Kid vomited in your minivan. Flat tire on your drive home. And because of stupid effing autocorrect, you just texted your boss that you ‘can’t wait to get crunk this weekend grrrrrrrl’. You are reaching your breaking point faster than…
“to extend or expand beyond a safe or reasonable point” Tuesday morning, 5:30 am. Mommy…mommy…you can hear the whispers. As you pry your groggy eyes open(ish) through the ridiculously early morning darkness,you make out what appears to be your 3-year-old pleading for some grapes…peeeeeeez. You stumble your way to the kitchen, tripping over a scattering of Tonka trucks and…
We’re watching the Never Ending Story while folding the Never Ending Laundry.
To the Mommyless Moms on Mother’s Day
For 19 years, I was lucky enough to have the most amazing mom ever to have lived on this earth. That’s her in the photo, wasn’t she ridiculously beautiful? I always loved the colors in the background, the silver lining around the Pacific waves that somehow emphasize the honey highlights in her hair. See, beautiful,…
My oldest boy is learning to write. He can’t quite get those tricky w’s, and he writes his sixes backwards. Right now, he loves homework. I mean not just a little, when he’s sent home with an assignment, it’s like Christmas morning for this kid. He cries if we can’t make it to a school…
Mommy’s Crabby: What Not To Do Next
Mommy woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. You know, the bed I share with daddy, the dog and now your wiggly 2-year-old brother who refuses to rest unless his hand is lying somewhere on my sleepy head.
How to Feel Like You’re Not Driving a Minivan, When You Are in Fact Driving a Minivan
I see you, minivan mom. You swore you’d never succumb to its elongated frame and matronly…well, everything. But lo and behold, baby #3 came along and kicked that promise right to the mother lovin’ curb. And now here you are schlepping droves of squealing children around to t-ball practice, surrounded by little landmines of goldfish cracker crumbs…
The Chaos of Boys
There’s a puddle on the bathroom floor, the plunger’s resting on the living room rug, and someone’s screaming ‘HELP ME’ from the kitchen.